You may have heard of a book that was written a few years ago called “The Five Love Languages.” I haven’t read it yet, but from the summaries I have heard, the book explains that people communicate and receive love in five major ways: acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, and physical touch. I must admit, at first I hated the concept of this book. Mostly because it seems super cheesy to ask people “What’s your love language.” Ick. It just sounds so- therapeutic and emotional. I just can’t hang with that type of diction. It’s a personal problem.
However, over the years, the concept has grown on me. As much as I hate the cheesy-ness of it, the five love languages do seem to be a quick and accurate way to discover a deeper truth or issue in relationships. It is super helpful in resolving conflicts, especially among roommates and (I would assume) couples.
As I looked more in to the idea of these “love languages,” the more it began to stick out to me: These are absolutely true of God as well! It’s a reasonable assumption, right? Scripture tells us we are made in the image of God, so it would follow logically that we would express and receive love in a similar fashion.
Still want convincing? (The answer should be yes!) Let’s look at each one.
Acts of service: The Word tells us that faith without deeds is dead (James2:14, 17), those who love the Lord will love His people (Matthew 25:31-46) , and even states that to love the Lord and love His people are the two most important commandments, supporting all the Law and the Prophets (Matthew 22:37-40)! God additionally spends countless verses admonishing believers in both the OT and NT to take care of the orphans and widows, and all those less fortunate than us. Jesus also set the perfect example for this in washing the disciples feet.
Words of affirmation: For God, words of affirmation are ESSENTIAL. First, this is the heart of worship! We are affirming God’s character. We are speaking well of Him. It is also an essential part of prayer. We must start by realizing Who it is we are talking to. If you don’t think this is a key part of God’s heart, read through the Psalms and check out the songs being sung around the throne in Revelation 4:8, 5:9, 11:17-18, 15:3-4, 16:16:7, 19:1-4, etc. Then look at how Jesus spoke of the Father! He always spoke highly of God, and he communed with Him frequently.
Quality time: Jesus made sure to make time to be with God. He would often even stay up all night just to go to a hilltop isolated from the crowds and talk to God. In the Garden of Gesthemene, He used His last moments as a “free man” to commune with God the Father. He could have fled; instead He prayed to God and submitted to His will. It is the same with us! We must spend time with God; we are told to “Pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17), and to “seek His face continually” (Psalm 105:4; 1 Chronicles 16:11). Spend time with Him- not just a Sunday morning.
Gifts: God asks for our tithes and offerings! He wants to invite us to partake in advancing the Kingdom financially, but it is also a way to express our love and affection for God. Scripture tells us that “the Lord loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7). Jesus displayed this by cleansing the temple (a house of prayer, not a den of robbers- they were misappropriating the funds!), as well as commending sacrificial givers like the poor widow in Luke 21:1-4.
Physical Touch: As you may be thinking, it is hard to express love for a Spiritual Being in terms of physical touch. However, for this expression, we must look to the life of Christ. Throughout His ministry, He performed a lot of healings. If you notice, He would often touch people as He healed them. This didn’t seem like a big deal to me until I realized that many of these people hadn’t been touched in years. They were considered unclean! The Lord cares enough about physical affection (and how that expresses love) that He healed by touching lepers. That is mind-blowing.
Not only can we see how God instructs us to love Him through these “Five Love Languages,” but we also see how He is the perfect example of each one! He knew His people and how to love them well. However, knowing this information about God and how He “receives love” (for lack of a better phrase- we know that God doesn’t need our love, but we’re privileged to give Him our affections), it spurs me on to love Him well.
I don’t like singing, but I know that the Lord loves to be serenaded. So I sing hard! It isn’t always easy to give financially, but I must make it a priority. Sometime, I want to take a nap instead of serve the needy, but I need to get over my prioritization of my own comfort. It may not be easy for me to wake up early and have a quiet time, but I can’t idolize sleep over my time with the Lord. When I see people hurting and dirty and in need, I may prefer to merely sympathize with their need, but I need to experience it; to touch and feel their life, not remain removed from it.
Do you see how we can choose to love the Lord well? How it is expressed in the love languages? In our lives?
This has radically altered how I love the Lord. It spurs me on to deeper exploration of new ways to express my affection for Christ. It also encourages me to be more “God-focused” in my relationship with the Lord. Sounds silly, right? But I’ve realized I’m so focused on how I feel loved by the Lord that I fail to consider how I can be a blessing to the Lord. It’s easy for me to think of ways to encourage other believers- but do I ever consider how I can encourage the Lord? How I can love Him better?
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