Do I invited Biblical masculinity, or force it?

So, ladies, I’ve been really convicted of something recently.  Examining my behavior, and behaviors of others around me, I’ve found myself asking myself the question: Am I the type of woman who forces a guy to man up, or a woman who invites him to? 

This is a question that I have been asking myself for a few months now.  Though the goal of both actions is the same, the method is completely different.

Let’s look at Esther and Ruth.  Esther was married to a king who had issued an edict to kill all of the Jews in the nation.  As his wife, she seized her opportunity for an audience with the king to plead on behalf of her people.  She told him the situation and pleaded for him to rectify the situation.  She invited him to help repair the situation, and he did. 

Ruth, one of my favorite Biblical women, was also a master at presenting a man with an opportunity to step up to Biblical manhood.  She was a widow who travelled with her mother-in-law back to Israel.  Boaz was a relative who was able to be a kinsman redeemer (a man who would marry the widow of a recently deceased relative to take care of her and provide for the family).  Ruth gleaned in his field and he made sure she was provided for. But he didn’t’ propose.  So Ruth took the opportunity to boldly invite him to step up to his duty.  She laid at his feet on the threshing floor, uncovering his feet.  Pretty bold for the time. And you know what Boaz did?  He showered her with lavish gifts of food and other provisions, then had her leave before the sun came up so that no one could say anything against her.  Then he went out the next day and claimed his right as kinsman redeemer.

These women were pros at inviting men to step up to their Biblical role as men.  Am I acting the same?  Am I inviting men to fill their role and calling as men, or am I trying to manipulate them in to doing it?  I want to be a woman who behaves in a way to lovingly encourages men to step up. However, I can not let the goal overshadow the method- I can not manipulate guys in to behaving a certain way. That is a work only the Lord can do.  But, I can also draw their attention to situations that could use their involvement.  Esther and Ruth didn’t have to manipulate guys in to stepping up- they simply brought something to their attention.  That is a great way to be a helpmate, not a burden.  That distinction makes an essential difference.